Count Your Blessings....

So A few weeks ago, my friend posted this on her blog. and I thought, what better way to choose Joy, what better way to count my blessings than to do what she did? So Here they are, the 7 deadly sins, with a twist. 

seven great things in your life.

1. My daddy. He is one of the most loving, caring, and supportive people I have ever met in my life. He has shown me what true love really means as he loved my mother with a love I have never seen from anyone else. and he loves my brother and I with an incredible love. He loves my niece with an indescribable love. He cares for others and he loves his God with EVERYTHING that is in him. 

2. My church. I am GREATFUL that I have the church family I do. They love me unconditionally. They take care of me. They make me feel important and special often. and they give me a chance to serve in the best way I know how. 

3. My Small Group. I get to meet with some of the most amazing people every Monday Night. We read the Bible together. We do life together. We share the happy moments, we care for one another during the trials. All in all, we are there for each other. And I believe with all of my heart that I would not make it through life without them in it. 

4. My Girl Friends. I have some of the BEST friends in the World. Ones from College  who have been my some of bestfriends for 13 years, and I know will be there for another 13 and more! You are amazing. I have so many women in my life who I am greatful for in Minnesota as well. Ones who are in my small group. Ones who are from Red Rock Camp who have become far more than just camp friends. Ones from my church family. ones I have had the joy of working with. ALL of you I am greatful for and thank God for each and everyday!

5. My honoary brothers. I have so many guys in my life who I am thankful for daily. The ones who were in college with me who teased me like a little sister but also took care of me, stood up for me, and watched out for me often. Ones who I can call now who will fix my car at a moments notice, who will drop what they are doing to come and pick me up when my car breaks down on the side of the road. Ones who will stand up for me when I am not being treated fairly and Im too nice to do it myself. Ones who will watch football with me. and yes, ones who still tease me, because i know their teasing is done in love for me. 

6. My baby brother, he has been my BEST friend since I was 2 years old and that will never change. I can laugh with him, I can cry with him. I can share moments with him that i can share with noone else. He is the best brother I could have ever asked for and he has given me 2 of the most amazing gifts in the World. An Incredible Sister in Law whom I am very greatful for and the most beautiful little girl in the World who I get to call my niece :) and she even looks like me! ha ha! 

7.  My un-phaseable ambition

seven things you lack and covet.

1. Money

2. A Better Car

3. A Skinnier Body

4. A Man (someone to cherish, and someone who cherishes me)

5. Children of my own

6. Family that lives close to me
7. Skills in the kitchen.

seven things that make you angry.

1. People who are not authentic or fake with each other

2. My moms death

3. My brother, my sister in law, and my niece live too far away

4. People who dont care about other people

5.  Murder

6. Mental Illness and how it affects the people I love

7.  CANCER, it sucks!

seven things that you neglect to do.

1. Sometimes I forget my house chores (sorry roomates, I will try to do better.)

2. Call my friends as often as I should

3. Eat breakfast.

4. Exercise (okay, ever)

5.  Write music as much as I want to

6. Read 

7. Blog

seven worldly material desires.

1. A new car

2.  An Ipad (I traded mine in and I miss it alot)

3.  A Brand New Bed

4.  Money so I never have to worry about anything material again. 

5. My own house that is fully furnished with everything. 

6. My Own Keyboard

7. I cant think of a number 7. 

seven guilty pleasures.

1. GLEE

2. Chocolate Anything

3. Ice cream. 

4. Reading (Hunger Games, Harry Potter, and many other books as well.)

5. Pop of almost any kind (especially Cherry Coke and Root Beer)

6. Eating Out

7. Facebook.

seven things you love about love.

1. Seeing someone in a way that noone else does

2. laughing together

3. Being best friends.

   4. Knowing things about them that noone else knows. 

5. Caring about someone in a deep and meaningful way. 

6. Knowing that someone loves you unconditionally

7. Relying on each other no matter what. 

THIS was fun! You should all do it too. I am thankful for the things God has given me in life. and for those things I dont have. Im thankful that God has shown me that HE is enough. 

Choose Joy

So its November. Thanksgiving time to be exact. Now, for those of you who know me at all, you know that November has become a very difficult time for me. Its my "dark month" if you will. It all actually starts in October. October is a time of great loss for many of my friends and family members. And October is the month when I got the call last year that I would be loosing my mom to her battle with Cancer, just 10 days later, on November 8th, I lost her on this Earth. Now, I know that I have hope of seeing her again someday. I know that she had GREAT FAITH and that she lived her life for God. I know that she left an incredible legacy, but all of that doesnt change the fact that right now, she is gone. I cant pick up the phone and call her on the days when Im hurting, I cant laugh with her at the funny things. I cant come home for the holidays and enjoy her food and help her decorate. It doesnt change the fact that right now, she is gone! and I miss her. 

I pride myself in being very bubbly and happy most of the time. But the past few weeks, I have lost that Becky in the memory of my mom. I havent felt happy. I havent wanted to feel happy. I have found myself going into this dark place of anger and bitterness and somehow, in a weird way, finding solace there. I know its not what my mom would want. I know deep down its not what I want. But its where Im finding myself if Im truly honest with you. 

A few weeks ago my friends started talking about tattoos and how they wanted one. I didnt say much during the conversation, but the more I thought about it, the more I thought that maybe I want one. Maybe getting one to remind me of my moms great Philosophy, maybe that would help carry on her legacy. You see my mom was one of the most caring people I know. My mom faced so much in her short life. But she was always strong. Always faithful. and Always thinking of others before herself. My mom loved people. And my mom always chose to have joy even in the midst of great trial. Its what I keep reminding myself of daily, "Choose Joy". You see, its because Joy is a choice. Happiness is a feeling, its something that is fleeting and its something that we cant fully rely on. But Joy. With Joy there is MORE. Its a confidience, a choice, a life that we choose to live. Its like in Daniel 3 when Shadrack, Meshack, and Abednego, as they faced the furnace they were about to be thrown in. Those men Chose Joy. They looked the King in the eyes and said, "We know our God will save us, but EVEN IF he doesnt, he is STILL OUR GOD!" You see, Choosing Joy is just like this. Its saying, I dont feel happy at all right now. I dont feel like celebrating at all right now. But I choose to remember that God is still God. That God has a plan here. I choose to remember that I have many blessings in my life, even though my mom is not her physically.

So today, at the end of this blog post, I would like to share some of my favorite memories with her. and I want to count the blessings I have in my life. 

Thanksgiving was my moms favorite holiday. She HATED the fact that Christmas was always over commercialized and that Thanksgiving got over looked. She LOVED to take the time to be thankful for what God had given her. 

Thanksgiving was a very special day in our house. It started early in the morning, We would wake up to the smell of my moms delicious Egg Bake Casserole and Cinnamon Rolls. She even made us fresh orange juice!

During Breakfast, we would watch the Macys Thanksgiving Day Parade on Television. Now let me tell you a secret. NOONE else in our house likes the Parade, but its my FAVORITE, so my family chose to put their time aside and watch it with me :) and they even pretended to enjoy it! They watched from beginning to end with me, even my favorite part, all of the people from Broadway performing before the parade. 

My mom would sneak away during the second half of the parade to wash dishes and begin cooking our meal for the day. and as he got older, my brother started cooking with her. They made some of the BEST meals in the world. My mom made the most delicious Butterhorn Rolls ever. And if you had a chance to taste them, you know Im not exaggerating. She would make turkey, corn casserole, potato casserole, green bean casserole, and even oysters, for my daddy, even though the rest of us hated them. :) 

My adopted grandparents lived in the basement of our duplex and so when lunch was made and the parade was over we would take the food downstairs to have lunch with Grandma and Grandpa Lindsay. Grandpa would always say, "This is the day that the Lord has made" as we walked into the house and we always finished by saying, "Let us rejoice and be glad in it". We would then sit down at the table. We were to go around the table and share one thing we were thankful for that year. Then we all prayed together. After lunch, we helped clean up and then mom and dad visited with Grandma and Grandpa. and THIS was my brother and my favorite part of the day. 

Because it was just upstairs, my mom let us go upstairs on our own to watch Home Alone. We could quote most of the movie to you. But we loved to laugh together and watch the movie together. It was our time of bonding. When that was done, my mom had desert for us. Pumpkin Pie for me, Pecan Pie for my brother, and Mince Meat Pie for my daddy. 

We ended the day with getting out the Christmas Decorations. and preparing to put them up the next day. and then we would pile in the car to go see what Christmas lights had already been put up. My brother didnt like this part of the day and usually fell asleep on my shoulder in the backseat during this time. But I wouldnt trade those moments for anything. 

You see, when you build such big traditions, loosing them is hard. It makes celebrating difficult. Suddenly you dont want to, I dont want to create new memories, because I liked the ones we already had :( I miss my mom. I miss my brother. But this year, I promise to be here for my daddy and make sure that he is NOT alone. 

I have SO MUCH to be thankful for! I am blessed!